Leave Some Room


A good amount of energy going into things that may show out to be pointless

I’m saying, what is the point if the pencil is not sharp?

Because when I speak to you, not even like a dart board does it hit the middle

Seems like you just couldn’t catch the point.

Furthermore,

The angel on my right shoulder would never steer me left, she asks me to give the benefit of the doubt but you can add color only so many times until you taint the original picture once expressed,

Now it’s paint splatter, mind matter all over

The paint brush and canvas that was once clean is no longer comparable to your dream once dreamt

Love has strained you to utilize other colors to show and tell fear as well as divergence cause some of us won’t believe it until we see it

Don’t blame us, it is how we’ve been molded

To where we not only want but need to feel movement, need to see improvement, in loves order to see that the person who is beside us can do it, without the gimmicks

Pursuing a cold heart will only kill a bold soul.

Today, if you attain the willpower,

Knock down the walls you’ve built to be sky scrapers,

Have you ever stopped to consider if you’re a giver or a taker?

Well, if not I’ll let you marinate in the thought

My girl Jasmine told me it ain’t a piece of writing ’til the truth begins to leak

So until next time, make sure you leave food on the table for other loved ones to eat

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Life Lemons

Initially, I trusted abundantly – select individuals changed my view on trust

unfortunately I didn’t believe hard enough that I had a choice to replenish my trust

So I lost it

I did not trust any longer

I was cold for a long time

Time passed. People passed.

I ended up renewing the almighty perspective to trust again because I realized I needed it to love again in order to love genuinely again.

As of late, I’m remembering why I stopped trusting so loosely and freely

People love you whilst treating you like a lemon, ferociously squeezing the pulp out of you.

Or to put it plainly use the fuck out of you until they are done with you

or perhaps they will use you as a stepping stool, in the least genuine way

Although it is our choice to be or to not be an expired, moth-eaten lemon,

The trial and error cycle is rather tiring

My method to my mechanism is always to include rather than exclude people,

in such a way that we can simply interchange healthy perspectives and not indulge in poor ones for the sake of self respect and protection

To not trust shouldn’t equal to closing ourselves off to other individuals and hate,

an atrocious amount of negativity will be internalized this way.

I don’t know who you are but I can offer you some perspective along your journey

As it is your choice to consider and your choice to pass on it

Please choose the way you pave your path wisely

Curiosity Diffused

Someone asked me – “What is your biggest challenge as a writer?”

My toughest struggle when I write is my fear of not delivering to my audience the way I want to be received. It stresses me when I write that I may not be received the way I want to be. Quite honestly, I’ve found comfortablility in being misunderstood – I figured the hell with forcing interpretation, my job as a writer is to be acknowledged, not understood.

Thank you for acknowledging me as a writer, too, by the way – it was also my struggle that I won’t be received as a real writer – that very dam wouldn’t allow my thoughts and words to flow coherently – One day I decided to take the strain off my soul and paint a picture I can hang and now my notebook is full of colors and words and life and struggle and happiness.

 

Free Write/ Week of 10/27/2014 / Lost in My Head

It would not suit my soul for this week to not be better than the last

I’m almost sure it will be more peaceful, for I have the power to make things go in that direction

Also,

I hope your week is better than your last and that your movements take you forwards not backwards

I, for one, need a break away from it all.

I feel over exposed when in reality I’m still just developing

Just developing; still changing

I am ever changing

Therefore I have the power to make peace.

Point blank.

In this weeks motives and goals I plan to sleep every night without the feeling that it is necessary to put the world away but instead simply wanting to get a good nights rest.

To not enter the realm of my dreams with these demons on my mind

But to sleep with a harmonious mind ready to bask in my dreams as my body is still

Because at the end of your day – what you dream is what you subconsciously think.

To put demons in my own definition – Some things I’m talking about are —

  • The way I demean or lower my own dignity and lead myself into believing I am not great enough for a certain area of life
  • The people around me who love me in the ‘wrong’ way because it isn’t love it’s hate
  • The other portion of people around me in which I love but cannot trust because my dreams won’t allow me to
  • Keeping up with the socially constructed life I was brought into involuntarily

I believe these demons can be erased in the name of faith

and the reminder that worrying is a waste of feeling.

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Reward life with your ability

You want to be loved.
You need to feel accepted
It isn’t easy. It’s a journey of change.

Such a journey I can cry.

We want to love and we won’t allow our very own selves, to love. We’ve heard of not attaining the power to control anyone or anything else but if you think..really think…. You can allow yourself to any thought and any action.

Be brave – Enjoy the time you have today.
Open your heart and don’t let pride deny you.

Show your scars and wounds to the skies and let your wounds radiate off of the sunlight.

Realize love is not a game and nothing stays the same.

Change for love.

 

Shy

Thank you for visiting even though I haven’t written anything for you in some time.

I’ve been busy trying to be an adult and handle situations maturely

I’ve actually been wondering why each out come for every action I do reveals itself to be so prematurely.

Undone, untimely, undeveloped.

Half of what that brings is discontentment, it sort of makes me feel like an adolesent

I’m grateful I’m trying. I’m appreciative I’m not dying.

The other half of what it brings is a boost of courage and divergence.

Dare to be different and responsible. Please.

Because the very thought of each of us being responsible for our own lives, scares the shit out of us.

Be awake. You can achieve the bravest things when done so.

When you survive and you make it you would have to know the meaning… this is your lifestyle for life.

You are no longer dreaming.